For some parents, their adult pursuit of social acceptance and accomplishments is almost completely wrapped up with the achievements of their children.

Many parents that worry about how their chidren handle peer pressure fail to recoganize that pressure among themselves.  Parent peer pressure is as equally forceful.  Some adults are driven to keep up, to be accepted, to be seen as one of the popular crowd, one of the winners.

When I listen to many parents talk about youth sports, I often hear the word “we”.  What is yourt child playing this spring?  We’re playing baseball and soccer.

Doug Abrams, a law professor at Missouri and a youth hockey coach for over 35 years, says he has seen youngsters in the locker room, chatting after a loss and looking forward to going to a movie or that nights sleep over.  Their obssed parents were still on the rink, yelling at the opposing team or the official because the parent could not accept the defeat their kids had already put behind them.

For adults caught up in the culture of youth sports they maybe  falling down a slippery path.

QUOTE FOR THE WEEK:

             “The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.”                        -W.C. Fields

Recent studies show that many high school female athletes report higher grades and higher marks on standardized test scores, and are even more likely to go on to college than their non-athletic counterparts.

Eighty-three percent of woman identified as key leaders in fortune 500 companies participated in sports during their childhood.

Playing sports pays off in lots of positive medical ways for girls as well as boys: reduction of symptoms of stress and depression, a reduced risk of obesity and coronary heart disease, and a reduced risk of osteoporosis.  Participation in sports also enhances their sense of self-esteem and self confidence.

Thought for the week:

                             “The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.”

                                                                                         -Dolly Parton

In football you have five areas that you need a solid philosophy on.

1- OFFENSE- You need to have a philosophy about how you want to run your offense. Are you going to be wide open and throw the ball all over the field or do you want to be a running team grounding out first downs.  It is best to run the style of offense you know best and see if it fits the players you have.  Many coaches believe in being balanced with the run/pass ratio.

2- DEFENSE- Will you be aggressive and attack with the blitz and gamble, or be  conservative with the bend and don’t break attitude.  Once again your thoughts and the type of players you have should help you determine which way you go.

3- TEACHING- There is a ton of information about how to coach/teach players.  You must decide what are the most important things and prioritize your time on these main points. These are the areas you want to coach to perfection.

4- SCOUTING- How much  you can scout will vary at different levels.  You scout your opponent to find their weakness’s so that  you can exploit them in devising your game plan.  Use your strengths, formations and personal to attack their faults.

5- ORGANIZATION- Everything in your program must be organized.

       1-practices   2- off-season program  3- equipment

I can’t tell you how and what to organize.  All I can do is get you to think about these things.

Thought for the week:   “Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.” 

                                                                                                              –Kin Hubbard

Many youth football coaches evaluate kids for skills that have nothing to do with performing that particlar position.  Often  a player is assigned a position based on just one requirement atributed to that position without taking into consideration the entirety of skills needed to play the position.

A coach must have explicit written out position descriptions for each and every position on their youth football team.  They must know what the requirements are for each position; speed, quickness, body control, strength, aggressivenes, smarts, and size needed to effectively play it.  Then they must map these requirements into their evaluation drills and games as they go through practices.

If the top requirement for position “A” is that the player be able to run through traffic and little Johnny wasn’t one of the top three players on the Gauntlet Drill, he shouldn’t be considered for the running positions.

You can always change a players position as the season goes on, but we should try and get them in the correct position as soon as possible.  Having a description written out for each position and doing drills that gives these younsters an opportunity to try and do them, is essential.

Thought for the week:

                 “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”       -Eleanor Roosevelt

Anytime or place for a conversation is OK, so long as there is no immediate crisis and there are no distractions such as the coach trying to run a practice.  Try to find and create a positive setting.  A setting that is  hassle-free, calm, and quiet helps a listener be more receptive.  Face to face conversation, with good eye contact and a respectful demeanor, is better than a phone call or e-mail.

Try and practice being an active listener.  Too often, coaches are braced for a flood of complaints from parents who come to talk.  Fight the impulse to unload.  Defy stereotypes.  Introduce your concern briefly and then, sit back and listen to the response….without rebutting or interrupting.  Just listen and summarize out loud what you’ve heard.  This should help the intensity of the situation melt away, as the coach feels respected, rather than attacked.  After he has said his peace than go into trying to persuade and explain your concerns.

Try and deliver an assertive, not an aggressive, message.  You want the coach to hear you, believe you, and help resolve the problem.  Describe the situation in non-judgmental terms.  Explain how it affects you and your child, and then state a preference for how you think it should be resloved.

Lastly be flexible.  Usually, we think we have a solution all figured out, before we know enough about the problems.  There are many ways to solve a problem, try to generate as many options as possible that combine the coaches interests and your own.

Thought for the week:      “If you see ten troubles coming down the road, you can be sure nine will run into the ditch before they reach you.”              –Calvin Coolidge

Enthusiasm is adding emotion to  effort.  A coach or player without enthusiasm is like a thristy man drinking a warm glass of water.  The drink will quench your thirst, but add ice and it becomes  even better.  The player will try but add enthusiasm and he will perform even better.

An unenthusiastic player is usually bored with things and has a hard time pushing himself to get better.  It is tough to win games with players who don’t necessarily want to be there.

Thought for the week:          

  “Having Children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist”

                                       -Michael Levine

If you want to prepare your young gladiator for better performance in contests, you should start hydrating them 24 – 30 hours before they compete.  Don’t wait for the day of the game to start pouring liquids down their throat.  Drinking water regularly even when they are not thirsty, the day before an event,  is the best way to get them hydrated .

On game day a good stategy is to get them to drink about 12-14 ounces of a sports drink, which usually provides about 30 grams of carbohydrate.  Do this about 15 minutes before the game.  During the game they should continue to drink water and at half time drink another 12 oz of the sports drink.  That is a lot of liquid going into a small stomach, but they must be encouraged to do so for  health reasons and  better performance.  Anything with caffine in it is a NO-NO.  Teach your child what is important to drink, before, during and after games and practices.

Thought for the week:           

   ”If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters very  much.”                                                   -Jackie Kennedy

Let me share with you a poem that every parent and youth coach need to read. Unfortunately the  author is unknown.

                                  “THERE ARE LITTLE EYES UPON YOU”

• There are little eyes upon you
• And they’re watching night and day
• There are little ears that quickly
• Take in every word you say;
• There are little hands all eager
• to do anything you do,
• And a little person who’s dreaming
• Of the day he’ll be like you.
• Your the little fellows idol;
• Your the wisest of the wise,
• In his little mind about you,
• No suspicious ever rise;
• He believes in you devoutly,
• Holds that all you can do,
• He will say and do, in your way
• When he’s grown-up like you.
• There’s a wide-eyed little fellow,
• Who believes your always right,
• And his ears are always open,
• and he watches day and night,
• You are setting an example,
• Every day in all you do,
• For the little boy who’s waiting
• To grow up to be like you.

Many other elements are necessary and important, but the coach makes or breaks the program.

Thought for the Week:      “If you want a place in the sun, you’ve got to expect a few blister.”                        -Abigal Van Buren

BURN OUT is a term that’s applied to young (and often very talented) athletes who decided that they no longer enjoy playing a particular sport.  They simply stop playing.

BURN OUT  can  occur for several reasons.  Perhaps the child is playing in so many games that they’re no longer fun.  Playing the sport has become a chore.  Or maybe the child is physically and emotionally exhausted from constantly having to compete and is just tired of having to please Mom, Dad, or the coach.  Sometimes, young athletes develop other interests in life and find that a particular sport is no longer their top priority. 

Whatever the underlying reason, one observation is clear: The child ‘s original passion for the sport has dwindled to a point where he/she just doesn’t want to go out and play anymore.  That is  the essence of burnout, and it’s a difficult situation for parents and coaches to grapple with.  Be SURE your child is playing because he/she wants to.

Thought for the week:                       “Even as the cell is the unit of the organic body, 

                                                                so the family is the unit of society.”      -Ruth Anshen

I know, I have been burned before and will probably be burned again.  I still cringe when I think of how much I respected OJ Simpson.  Watching him race up and down the football field when he was a Heisman Trophy winner at USC got me to appreciate and respect him.  I still get goose bumps when I see replays of him getting the game ball after he broke the NFL rushing record on a cold snowy Sundayafternoon in Buffalo, New York.  So he allegedly butchered his ex-wife and her male companion.  Jurors found him innocent but I never did or will.

Then there was Michael Vick, the Atlanta Falcons starting quarterback and one of the highest paid players in the NFL.  I thought this guy was not only talented, but very respectful and genuine.  He was sentenced to two years in a federal prison for his role in a dog fighting conspiracy and  having many dogs cruely put to death.  Yes, he is now trying to change his life around, BUT should he be a hero.  Nike has just resigned him to a very nice contract

I was really crushed when I found out about the many escapades of Tger Woods.  For many years I believed he was  a very good example for young jocks to look up to.  WRONG

How about Barry Bonds, Pete Rose, Ron Artest, Plexico Burris, Roger Clemons and Pac Man Jones.  Not all heroes of mine but could have been worshiped by someone someplace.  All sports stars and former heroes who have fallen to some kind of disgrace.  John Daly was a golfer I enjoyed watching over the years.  Now, you can’t even find him in a tournament.  His bout with gambling and alchol has made him an embarrassment not only to himself but the PGA.

I also remember well when young Mike Tyson was just starting to make a name for himself in the boxing world.  I was a big FAN.  Now, I think he is nothing more than a punch drunk punk.

If you think getting soiled is limited to the male gender than you are sadly mistaken.  Remember Tonya Harding.  She actually had her main rival’s leg clubbed in hopes that her skating career would be over so Ms Hardy would reign supreme.  Marion Jones admitted to using steroids in 2000-2001.  She was immediately stripped of her medals.

Allowing our kids (and me) to worship athletes needs to be re-evaluated.  Mothers and fathers rather than baseball, football and basketball players are meant to model morality for their children.  If kids need heroes why not someone like Pat Tillman who gave up his professional NFL career to serve his country.  Don’t make him a hero because he was an outstanding football player, but because he gave up so much for a cause that cost him his life.  Martin Luther King and his speech about being taken to the mountaintop would make a good hero.  This clergyman was a prominent leader in the African-American Civil Rights movement.

How about Captain Chesley Sullenberger who crashed landed his plane into New York Hudson River saving the lives of 155 people.  Other good heroes are the Navy Seal ‘s Special Forces who finally got Bi Laden .

I might be off base but I think we are all watching even when we are right or wrong. 

Thought for the week:

                   “Sports do not build character.  They reveal it.”           -Heywood Hale Broun